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Don’t Fuck With Me! Hollywood Police Community Relations

It’s open season on anybody who isn’t a cop in Hollywood. Who’s got us in the cross-hairs? Why, it’s the police of course. They treat homeless people like dirt. They treat everybody else worse. Don’t let them pull you over or they’ll tow your car at the drop of a hat. Don’t say anything except, “Sir, yes Sir!” or your ass is grass. Any encounter with a Hollywood cop will end in public humiliation at best, a good beating perhaps and even arrest. Say “Cop!” in Hollywood and it’s as bad as yelling “Fire!” People will scatter like ants in the wake of boiling water. Let’s add some multimedia to this posting to give it some meat, or should I say, “edge?”

When I see a black and white police car coming my way, all I do is lower my head in an attitude of complete submission. To do otherwise is to invite hellfire to rain upon my head.

Then let us not forget about the intrusive ghetto birds, also known as police helicopters. Oh, how they stir up the skies above my head, and shine their lights into my pad. They are responsible for many an interrupted night’s sleep.

How fun was that?

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My Cross Street Rocks!

And at all hours!

© Russell Smith, 2011

Every Sunday to Thursday evening, they’re out there, pulling over scofflaws- people who run stop signs, exceed 25 mph in a residential area and drivers under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol (DUI). Hollywood, in case you haven’t heard, is a cesspool of homelessness, drugs, crime and tourists. They’ve opened up so many nightclubs that on the weekends it is DUI heaven up in here. And you can quote me on that. The cops don’t really enforce the law, so much as pick up the pieces of people who need some repairs, whether it’s their bodies, their cars or both. The sound of the ghetto birds cheers the heart all through the weekend, along with its close friend the siren-bird whose lilting dulcet sounds can be heard all over Hollywood every night of the week.

© Russell Smith, 2011


There he is, our propellor-driven friend, keeping the skies and streets of Hollywood safe.

© Russell Smith, 2011

Quit Telling me I’m Hell-bound!

Marching Day for the Pentecostals


So what do you think motivates these people? A real need to save souls, spread the gospel, or is it to earn what I call “God Points.” These people are no different from the Catholic Church, which still peddles indulgences. The Catholic form comes in regulating behavior: say the Hail Mary ten times every day and you earn 50 years indulgence! Or something along those lines. They are some suffering from the God delusion and they are trying to push it on others. I find proselytizers annoying, but when I see a crowd like this, I can’t help but laugh.
I’ve accumulated a few funny pictures along the way, so let me present you with the Israelites and Korean Pentecostals, who take the cake for amusing cults.

Korean Pentacostals, © Russell Smith 2011

Israelites, © Russell Smith

The Israelites, © Russell Smith, 2011


So you can see the Pentecostals doing their thing, speaking in tongues, etc. Note the bullhorn near at hand. Now the Israelites got angry with me when I took their picture. Actually only one guy (the Leader?) became agitated. I responded, “Well you are the ones who are looking for attention!” “We’re not looking for attention!” They shouted back in unison, which I found a little creepy, but I said laughing, “You’ve got signs. You don’t want people to look at the signs?” “Get out of here you Devil” said The Leader? getting annoyed at my logic in the face of their outright stupidity, unpatriotic weirdness. I don’t think White people can join this cult, but you never know. There was a Black guy with the Pentecostals. I used to get super annoyed at these proselytizers, and I have them on video saying the stupidest things with me screaming abuse at them. It’s fun to watch but I’m not adding any more media to this post. Hollywood Hugs!

People Like to Stop and Stare

So hungry are tourists and locals for some proof of A+ quality celebrity sightings, that they want to know more about Hollyblog.com. Look at the ridiculous state of my tee shirt: so here we are.

© Russell Smith, 2011

There might be some hope. I got rejected from the peer-reviewed art show run by Rex Bruce via his gallery downtown, LACDA- Los Angeles Center for Digital Art. DAH? LACK DAH!

hummingbird 1



hummingbird 1, originally uploaded by Hollywood Russ.

Don’t you wish you were a hummingbird!

The Artists’ Wall

There is a wall on a building on Highland Ave and someone or somebodies put up art. It changes all the time as the owners of the building tear it down, paint over it and otherwise destroy it. I like to photograph it while there’s time. Here are a couple of examples. I hope you love them as much as I do. If you know where the PowerHouse bar is, then you know what I’m talking about. There’s a terrible Chinese restaurant there too. MSG WARNING! See? Lots of little useful tidbits here on the Hollyblog! See!

© Russell Smith, 2011

© Russell Smith

VIDEO VAULT – RED LINE AND CROSSROADS OF THE WORLD OOOH

Hooray, hooray, hooray

Who needs hallucinogens when you live in a ‘hood like Hollywood?

© Russell Smith, 2011

There’s always a friendly face to greet you when you de-subway at the Hollywood & Highland stop on the demonic Red Line. It cracks me up that the guy doesn’t even mention MSNBC. This picture would thrill the pants off of Rupert Murdoch, who is busy putting out a big fire in England. Let me tell you. This guy was proud of his sign. Please forgive my unfortunate use of the word crack!

© Russell Smith, 2011

I hate Madame Tussaud’s! Their figures are not wax. They are plastic. Check out the guy getting his jollies looking at the Asian woman’s body, while she is obliviously taking a picture. (You have to click on the images to get a larger view). Busted! I love candid photography.

© Russell Smith, 2011

Hollywood is larger than life. Life is larger than life, so Hollywood is larger than itself. Sometimes I get sick of all the tourists and crackheads but it really is an amazing place to live. Where else can I buy ashtrays with the Hollywood Walk of Fame on the bottom? There’s been a multi-billion dollar renovation of the town. Hundreds of new overpriced apartment units have gone up. It seems as though the character of the place really is changing. I heard a man once say that “In ten years, Hollywood will look just like Manhattan.” The last time I was in Manhattan I saw a lot of Starbucks, GAPs, and all the rest of the homogenizing chains. But I get what he’s saying. Hollywood will be expensive, flashy with restaurants and nightclubs, goody-goody with its overpriced organic food distributors. Über-gentrification might be a good name for the process.