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Calling all VD Clinics!

While I am still reeling over…

Gabourey Sidibe‘s rip off by the Oscars, I can at least celebrate Mo’Nique’s victory. But in a way, she pisses me off. Clearly she’s had a serious make over. She’s much thinner than she used to be and her face looked different. Was it a face-lift? If it’s botox, then she really, really deserves the Oscar. I’ve always loved Mo’nique since The Parkers and Showtime at the Apollo. And I can’t help but show my Maryland roots when I brag that she is from Balmer, hon! That’s right. It takes another Baltimoron to come into Hollywood and show them how it’s done.

But let’s get real for a minute. We know why Gabby, as her friends call her, didn’t get that precious statue.

No, I’m not blaming Daisy de la Hoya, per se, for snatching the Oscar from her hands, but Sandra Bullock got it for the following reason : Mo’Nique trumped Sidibe by getting Best Supporting Actress and there was no way the Academy was going to let both of these ulta-talented, big-boned African-American actors beat out the likes of Botox Bullock, who hails from Arlington, Virginia. The only time Sandra Bullock gave a performance worthy of note was in Speed, and that’s probably  because she was on the stuff  during the filming. I don’t know what kind of magic dust they spinkled on that set because even Keanu Reeves pulled off a decent job of acting.

As Ms. de la Hoya proves with her silicon tits and collagen lips is that beauty trumps talent. At least a skewed, funhouse version of beauty, where up is down and nip is tuck. What was she doing on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams yesterday? She was auditioning for a show on the Playboy Channel. It’s unclear if VH1 will do a second season of her reality show, Daisy’s House of Love.

But wait, there’s more. This old, washed up child star from the Eighties, Corey Haim died of an overdose and it turns out he was dating de la Hoya. She’s been tweeting about her heartbreak, “I’m sooooooo devastated right now. This is the worst day ever I can’t believe this.” The 28-year-old’s publicist revealed to Eonline.com, “She’s bawling and inconsolable.” On Access Hollywood, just a week ago, she was fighting back tears. “I was supposed to see him (Haim) at some point later on in this week.” In a later, even more profound tweet, Daisy tweeted, “Why do I always fall for the lost soul? We could of [forgive the grammar] been lost together, now you’re lost forever… I’ll miss you.” I can see Shakespeare up in Heaven, putting down his quill and wiping a tear from his eye.

Oscar, FrooFroo is waiting

Daisy, if you read this and decide to go ghetto, don’t send your uncle Oscar to beat me up. My friend just got a new maltese poodle. FrooFroo is only 8 weeks old, but he’s hungry and I’m sure he’ll eat Oscar alive. Don’t get me wrong. We’ve all heard the rumors. It might be a tough match.